Gratitude in Retrospect

When I was 16, I had the fortune in being in some play as a lead actor - the unfortunate thing is that I cannot remember for the life of me what the play was about however it turned out to be a huge success. So much for that! LOL! But I remember that my father came to every play and each time I would deliver a joke or great performance he would stand up and clap/cheer loudly - the teenager in me was so embarrassed but in retrospect that is now a very dear memory to me because, it didn't matter to anyone else, but to my father I was a super star! May seem irrelevant but now I realize because of his pride in me I gained a level of confidence that has carried me through since his passing... and that... my friends... is priceless! Peace and blessings.

Wangari Mathaai

It is with sadness that the world learned of Wangari Mathai's Passing.

Her legacy:
The enviorinment, womens rights, social justice among others.

She made our continent proud as the First African Woman to win a Nobel Prize. In her honor, I suggest that for every celebration in your life, plant a tree. Plant a tree when you graduate, get a promotion, have you first child etc. Honor these wonderful occasions by planting a tree - Thats what Wangari would do. In fact, when she learned she had won the Nobel Peace Price, she went out and planted a tree. It is so special to plant a tree because it is always there to remind you of these wonderful experiences we have had on earth.

Thank you Wangari, thank you.

http://www.greenbeltmovement.org/

What a waste of time…

What a waste of time listening to the loads of speculation in my mind. Don’t believe everything you think! The mind is a wonderful thing - it can roam free and allow you to explore any possibilities you desire. Everything you see began with a thought. First somebody thought about it and then made it happen. So yes, the mind is awesome! But, as with any freedom comes responsibility(Viktor Frankl). We must be responsible for our thoughts and what we allow to roam into our minds. So a friend or loved one upset you and you argued and you felt bad etc. Two months later, there you are, consumed in your thoughts, populating and justifying your point of view. In some cases you are trying to make sense of the situation but then you get caught up in the emotion that they invoked within you and you begin to travel down the senseless load of speculation… “you know what, that woman is just a..” It is a waste of time however. The only person you have control over and can truly understand is yourself - you only know you, and you will never be able to enter somebody else's mind to get answers and that's not necessarily a bad thing. Its easier said than done, but you must make the effort to let go of these time wasting thoughts so that you can enjoy your life in the present moment. We have one life and it is here and now. Now is the most important moment – not tomorrow, or next week at graduation or when you win the lottery one day… its now. Cause guess what, all those things will 1. Come and go 2. Occur in the present moment – life doesn’t have tivo, you can't fast forward to next week then return to now. We only have now and its beautiful - and when we are consumed with such time wasting thoughts, they rob us from now. Peace and blessings.

Want to do charity in Africa?

The biggest mistake many of my good hearted friends who would like to do charity in Africa make is making assumptions. These assumptions are of perspectives based on their own realities and almost absolutely independent of the community they work in or want to work in. Here are a few tips:

One: Poverty is relative – Just because I live in a mud hut does not mean I am poor. My ancestors lived in mud huts for centuries and they are just fine. The building materials are friendly to the environment, I use less and waste less. If you want to help me, help me because I asked, not because you decided I have problems. If you come to my village you will not find me crying wallowing in my poverty. In fact you will probably find me doing what I do – providing for my family the best I can. I am not on anti-depressants and I can assure you that there are people like me from wherever you came from – struggling to do this thing called life.

Two: Ask yourself truly what you are going to do in Africa. What is the goodwill you seek to do motivated by? Is it because your friends will think highly of you? Is it because you think that the people you are going to “help” need you? If that is the case, save you thousands of dollars for a plane ticket and volunteer at your local shelter, Samaritans Purse, Goodwill or whomever is working in your own community. Chances are you will understand the needs of your own home better than you will in foreign lands. If you just want to help elsewhere because you have the capacity then surround yourself with honest people who can help you understand the culture of the place you are going to. Understand the needs gap and then empower. Do not give hand outs – otherwise you're no different from the arrogant self serving idiot that thinks they can solve systemic problems that you can’t understand over a limited period of time.

Three: Don’t be a part of the problem – there is a saying – the road to hell is paved with good intentions. Without understanding the people you hope to serve, your efforts can end up detrimental to any progress towards the growth of these communities. Community growth and development has to occur organically with real lasting solutions. Yes, some of it is trial and error but you must be careful when dealing with human beings. We hear of several stories where donations have been pocketed by corrupt individuals never reaching or benefiting the grass root level.

Four: Be careful of your own self. This goes back a little to tip number two. Every human being sees the world through their own eyes built on their own personal, cultural and social experiences. It is not common to find a pet sleeping in their owner’s bed in an average African household because it is considered an animal and animals live outside – this may be viewed differently in some parts of the western world where sometimes there is a human like affection towards pets and pets are considered to be family members. This is just a small example where if one were to come into a foreign community with their own conceptions, the opinions would be inaccurately influenced.

Five: The media over the last 30 years has done a tremendous job of painting Africa as a hopeless, disease infested continent. When you go there you will find that there is everything – probably the largest resource of precious minerals in the world, skyscrapers, town and cities, churches, mosques, synagogues, temples, night clubs, shopping malls, wild life, beaches… All colors of people black, white, mixed race, Asian heritage… All sorts of livelihoods, marketers, engineers, business people.. all sorts of institutions, universities, schools, libraries, a rich culture of art BUT that is not what mainstream media focuses on. So when you arrive on the continent and are fixated on that media perception, you interpretation can go two ways – positively or negatively. It is therefore important especially to us to appreciate the continent and its vast diversity and beauty and furthermore acknowledge it, because then, we will welcome you. We will not want to welcome you if it appears that you look down on us. We don’t need that and hence some of us are weary of foreigners. It is our nature to welcome strangers as we would our own and that’s how we got colonized.

So my good hearted friends that like to do charity in Africa – ask yourselves why? If you can answer honestly then bear in mind these few tips. Learn learn learn about the charity work currently going on and figure out whether you fit in that puzzle. If you are honest and realize that you are driven by an egoist need then just take a vacation in Africa – you will still be helping by promoting the tourism industry which provides jobs and livelihoods for many of our people, it is one of the largest income generating avenues for many African countries – you will have a good time and we will welcome you back happily every time.

Passion

Today was an interesting day. I thought I would dash to the gas station and get fueled up for the next day and then get back home and relax but that was not how it happened. You see, life is interesting – I had envisioned my evening in front of the telly having dinner and later take a walk outside but I spent most of the evening at the gas station trying to get my car to start. Now the irony is that I got home from work, then left to go across the road for gas with hopes of getting back in 5 minutes. If I had not moved, I guess I would have found out the next morning that the car was out of order and I would have had a crummy morning.

I digress however… this story is about a 16 year old two weeks shy of graduating from high school. He works at the convenience store and is always so kind to me. I must describe him – he is about 5ft 6 Inches, red head, pale with a ton of freckles. He has a punk rock hair cut (I would say) - it’s probably the latest fashion right now for kids his age… After getting gas, I tried to start my car but it just wouldn’t cooperate.

Now, I knew nothing about this young boy except that he worked at the gas station. When he saw that I was having car trouble, he came out and began helping me investigate the car problem. He took apart the battery terminals as well as the connections, cleaned them out and did a number of other things to try and get it to start. I could tell that he clearly knew what he was doing so I asked him where he learned to do all this. He said it was his hobby and furthermore, his own car, which at this point was pulled up to my car for a jump start - was a re-modified creation of his own. The child blew my mind. As we kept talking I couldn’t help but notice his speech impediment – I later found out that he would be graduating from a private school that I think serves children who have different academic needs.

This is the thing that I learnt from my young friend – if you are passionate about something just do it! You must be the number advocate for your talent - the Number one believer. Don't wait around for someone to push you or the magical signal from the winds(i.e. whatever is making you procrastinate). If you are a good writer, singer, shoe sales man, just do it because your talent is a gift to the world and in turn a shift to manifesting your reason for being here on earth. This boy knew his cars and knew them really well. I hope that he becomes a super car engineer or whatever the highest ranking position in the car world is – scratch that, I hope that he fulfils his heart’s desire in whatever work his talent will lead him.

So, I am passionate about writing - I got my butt of the couch and wrote this piece recognizing that it is important to do what you are passionate about – in this context, it will surely do you and us good.

The journey continues

Once in a while I get to a place where I feel peace and I am peace and there is no distinction between who I am and what I feel. The who I am is what I have after many years cultivated through my own ideas and societies ideals of what I should be. These distinctions between how I feel and who I am is different. How I feel is difficult to describe in words but simply put, I am here. There is usually silence in my mind. I am not thinking about what I need to do or how things will turn out or running through my mental checklist. I am just sitting or standing, or washing dishes but not thinking. Just doing. In those moments, I feel happy and free. These moments are short lived – at least for now. Then the dreaded switch goes on and I begin to worry about things that have not even happened, things that might happen, things that happened. When the switch goes on, I am no longer here. In those moments of silence there is clarity but I have no need to solve possible situations or lament on things that happened. In this place of silence, there are no problems. When I think during these moments, it is because I have taken my mind and used it as a tool to do something. My mind is not running wild, it’s more like a computer and my true self, the peaceful me, is the user. I use my mind to execute what needs to be done and I do it and finish. The work created when I am in this space is often splendid. In that space, I know the answers to whatever questions I have – not the logical questions, the questions that plague me in life. Am I doing the right thing? Am I happy with my job? Should I move? Am I doing what I was meant to do. In that space I know the answers and when I remember, I take the opportunity to answer those questions. The problem is after the dread switch goes on, I forget the answers and I forget all the solutions and its back to worrying and lamenting. The worrying doesn’t normally seem “bad” but it’s tiring. I am often exhausted after a full day of worrying about what people think of me, how important I am, how so and so did me wrong and all the rest of the time wasting thoughts yet I rarely make the connection between my exhaustion and how I arrived at my moment of tiredness. I just get home and think – jeez – what a long day – yes, of course it was long. Time flies when you are having a good time, paying attention to what you are doing and doing it to the best of your ability. The day is really really long when you are not present and constantly look at the clock, meaning you are not paying attention to what you are doing and you’re probably not doing something you enjoy. If you pay attention to what you are doing and do it to the best of your ability even if you don’t enjoy it per se, time will go by and that means you will be present in what you are doing and not worrying about possible problems or past resentments. The journey of getting back to myself, peaceful self continues…

You Reap What You Sow!

Email Forward

Good morning said a woman as she walked up to the man sitting on ground.
The man slowly looked up.

This was a woman clearly accustomed to the finer things of life. Her coat was new. She looked like she had never missed a meal in her life.

His first thought was that she wanted to make fun of him, like so many others had done before. "Leave me alone," he growled....

To his amazement, the woman continued standing.

She was smiling -- her even white teeth displayed in dazzling rows. "Are you hungry?" she asked.

"No," he answered sarcastically. "I've just come from dining with the president. Now go away."

The woman's smile became even broader..

Suddenly the man felt a gentle hand under his arm.

"What are you doing, lady?" the man asked angrily. "I said to leave me alone.

Just then a policeman came up. "Is there any problem, ma'am?" he asked..

"No problem here, officer," the woman answered. "I'm just trying to get this man to his feet.. Will you help me?"

The officer scratched his head. "That's old Jack. He's been a fixture around here for a couple of years. What do you want with him?"

"See that cafeteria over there?" she asked. "I'm going to get him something to eat and get him out of the cold for awhile."

"Are you crazy, lady?" the homeless man resisted. "I don't want to go in there!" Then he felt strong hands grab his other arm and lift him up. "Let me go, officer. I didn't do anything."

"This is a good deal for you, Jack," the officer answered. "Don't blow it."

Finally, and with some difficulty, the woman and the police officer got Jack into the cafeteria and sat him at a table in a remote corner. It was the middle of the morning, so most of the breakfast crowd had already left and the lunch bunch had not yet arrived...

The manager strode across the cafeteria and stood by his table. "What's going on here, officer?" he asked. "What is all this, is this man in trouble?"

"This lady brought this man in here to be fed," the policeman answered.

"Not in here!" the manager replied angrily. "Having a person like that here is bad for business."

Old Jack smiled a toothless grin. "See, lady. I told you so. Now if you'll let me go. I didn't want to come here in the first place."

The woman turned to the cafeteria manager and smiled. "Sir, are you familiar with Eddy and Associates, the banking firm down the street?"

"Of course I am," the manager answered impatiently. "They hold their weekly meetings in one of my banquet rooms."

"And do you make a goodly amount of money providing food at these weekly meetings?"

"What business is that of yours?"

I, sir, am Penelope Eddy, president and CEO of the company."

"Oh."

The woman smiled again. "I thought that might make a difference." She glanced at the cop who was busy stifling a giggle. "Would you like to join us in a cup of coffee and a meal, officer?"

"No thanks, ma'am," the officer replied. "I'm on duty."

"Then, perhaps, a cup of coffee to go?"

"Yes, ma'am. That would be very nice."

The cafeteria manager turned on his heel, "I'll get your coffee for you right away, officer."

The officer watched him walk away. "You certainly put him in his place," he said.

"That was not my intent. Believe it or not, I have a reason for all this."

She sat down at the table across from her amazed dinner guest. She stared at him intently. "Jack, do you remember me?"

Old Jack searched her face with his old, rheumy eyes.. "I think so -- I mean you do look familiar."

"I'm a little older perhaps," she said. "Maybe I've even filled out more than in my younger days when you worked here, and I came through that very door, cold and hungry."

"Ma'am?" the officer said questioningly. He couldn't believe that such a magnificently turned out woman could ever have been hungry.

"I was just out of college," the woman began. "I had come to the city looking for a job, but I couldn't find anything. Finally I was down to my last few cents and had been kicked out of my apartment. I walked the streets for days. It was February and I was cold and nearly starving. I saw this place and walked in on the off chance that I could get something to eat."

Jack lit up with a smile. "Now I remember," he said. "I was behind the serving counter. You came up and asked me if you could work for something to eat. I said that it was against company policy."

"I know," the woman continued. "Then you made me the biggest roast beef sandwich that I had ever seen, gave me a cup of coffee, and told me to go over to a corner table and enjoy it. I was afraid that you would get into trouble... Then, when I looked over and saw you put the price of my food in the cash register, I knew then that everything would be all right."

"So you started your own business?" Old Jack said.

"I got a job that very afternoon. I worked my way up. Eventually I started my own business that, with the help of God, prospered." She opened her purse and pulled out a business card. "When you are finished here, I want you to pay a visit to a Mr. Lyons...He's the personnel director of my company. I'll go talk to him now and I'm certain he'll find something for you to do around the office." She smiled. "I think he might even find the funds to give you a little advance so that you can buy some clothes and get a place to live until you get on your feet.. If you ever need anything, my door is always opened to you."

There were tears in the old man's eyes. "How can I ever thank you?" he said.

"Don't thank me," the woman answered. "To God goes the glory. Thank Jesus... He led me to you."

Outside the cafeteria, the officer and the woman paused at the entrance before going their separate ways...

"Thank you for all your help, officer," she said.

"On the contrary, Ms. Eddy," he answered. "Thank you. I saw a miracle today, something that I will never forget. And..And thank you for the coffee."


Have a Wonderful Day. May God Bless You Always and don't forget that when you "cast your bread upon the waters," you never know how it will be returned to you..